Self Improvement Digest

One of the things that my clients often say is, "Why isn't there a place for us to get together and talk about personal development" or I hear, "I don't know anyone else who is into this at all".

Personal development can be very isolated. You tend to read a book, maybe attend a course or two, but usually, it's something you do by yourself.

Coming together in a community is a really good way to not only meet like minded people, something that can often be missing from your life, but to share information and problems. You can get advice from people, ask questions about subjects that are confusing you and basically, speed up the changes you want to make. Being in this community means an end to scratching your head wondering how a technique works or what a book means, and a start to real and rapid progress.

Community is a natural part of humanity. For as long as human beings have been, we've been gathering together in communities of mutual interest. You see this now in football supporters. Having the need for community, they gather together, share stories, have a drink and enjoy themselves.

Being a member of any community, whether it is a supporters group, a hobby or interest group, a sports club or whatever feels good to you as a human. We are all naturally drawn to gather together with people of like mind.

Joining a personal development community is a great way to turbo-charge your advances and really change your life. Just imagine being able to ask a question and get a dozen experts answering your question in minutes.

I recently attended a seminar where I was fortunate enough to be introduced to a personal development tool of great benefit to me. I have come to realize the importance of having a balanced life, caring for myself as well as for others and believing that I am worthy of success.

I have discovered that I had inbuilt negative barriers which I learned from my parents as a young child, from my mother as a young adult and also from society which were preventing me from achieving my goals. The good news is that these negative beliefs can be unlearned and a more positive outlook adopted. Once beliefs and behaviours are adapted, your results will change.

I have improved my memory, become a better listener and also developed the art of small talk.

All of these changes are uplifting, enlightening and empowering. My outlook is more positive and I now believe I have the power to live the life I have always wanted.

The great news is that not only am I benefiting from the power of personal development, but I am also in a position to create an income for myself. You see, Success University not only enables you to grow through personal development but is a network marketing company offering step-by-step guidelines to ensure member's success.

I am eagerly awaiting the arrival of my Empower Magazines. This magazine has been designed to offer information on wealth creation, providing a cash-flow strategy and a personal development program. The magazine is very professional, contains personal stories of success and also includes a CD/DVD outlining the company. By introducing this magazine to your friends/acquaintances you can create a network marketing business generating income.

More recently I undertook a course on setting goals. I learnt the art of writing positive affirmations concerning all areas of my life. But even more exciting is by putting music to your affirmations (called musivation) you are able to recall your affirmations easily and immediately feel the power of being in a positive state. I took my main affirmation with relation to Success University goals and put it to a jingle that I have known since childhood. I was amazed at how many times throughout the day this jingle popped into my head, it was almost constant. How powerful do you think this jingle is to my mindset? It uplifts and empowers me every time I hear it, which must be around 100 times a day.

The benefits I have achieved through personal development have been extremely positive. My outlook on life is always positive, I am totally focused on my goals and I now know where I am going.

If you are stuck in a rut, tired of your job or always focusing on the negatives in your life, do yourself a favour and consider personal development. Go to the bookstore and purchase a book on personal development (I'm currently reading a book by Jack Canfield titled "How to Get from Where You Are to Where You Want to Be"). I undertake online courses in personal development, read something uplifting on a daily basis and focus daily on my goals. If I can do it, you can too. Make 2008 your year to grow (and then continue to grow for all time).

Just after publishing my first ebook, Dream Your Life Positively which dealt basically with the universal laws of attraction, a good friend asked me: Does it means that all disasters, diseases, or personal loss are a reflection of my thoughts?

The world we live in is our responsibility I said. We act and interact with the other inhabitants of this planet. By direct or indirect connection, these negative energy waves cross your path. It is not the ACT itself of this negative energy the important factor. You are not to be blamed for all the horrors happening in your life or around the world but your ACTION and reaction towards them is very much a direct cause of how these energies will decrease or increase. Your ability to accept the challenges thrown in your path and take responsibility for your actions will define and create the map of your life's journey.

Deciding to approach your daily life in a positive way will attract things and people who are positive towards you. It is that simple. If you look at life as a blessing, the universe has an inexhaustible supply of riches reserved for you. On the other hand if you see it as a curse, it will become a curse. Read again Dream Your Life Positively to reconnect with this force inside you. A dear friend once sent me this story which I want to share with all of you. It is a simple letter that made the rounds of the web, and nobody knows its origin, but it exemplifies in a poignant way my view on the Law of Attraction.

I hope it will touch you as deeply it touched me. Do a positive action right now and send this link to all of your friends. "The Present" Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room. One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs. His bed was next to the room's only window. The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back. The men talked for hours on end.

They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service , where they had been on vacation. Every afternoon, when the man in the bed by the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window. The man in the other bed began to live for those one hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the world outside. The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake.

Ducks and swans played on the water while children sailed their model boats. Young lovers walked arm in arm amidst flowers of every color and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance. As the man by the window described all this in exquisite details, the man on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine this picturesque scene. One warm afternoon, the man by the window described a parade passing by.

Although the other man could not hear the band - he could see it in his mind's eye as the gentleman by the window portrayed it with descriptive words. Days, weeks and months passed. One morning, the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths only to find the lifeless body of the man by the window, who had died peacefully in his sleep. She was saddened and called the hospital attendants to take the body away. As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man asked if he could be moved next to the window.

The nurse was happy to make the switch, and after making sure he was comfortable, she left him alone. Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look at the real world outside. He strained to slowly turn to look out the window besides the bed. It faced a blank wall. The man asked the nurse what could have compelled his deceased roommate who had described such wonderful things outside this window. The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see the wall. She said, "Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you."

Epilogue: There is tremendous happiness in making others happy, despite our own situations. Shared grief is half the sorrow, but happiness when shared, is doubled. If you want to feel rich, just count all the things you have that money can't buy. "Today is a gift, that is why it is called The Present ."

Just Like the human body, the human mind is always striving to maintain its health, and the many modern forms of psychological therapy, or "psychotherapies," aim to stimulate and support this process. Traditionally, compassionate personal interaction in soothing surroundings has been used to heal the mind. Alongside this, however, was often harsh treatment for the deranged, who were thought to have been touched by evil, struck down by the gods, or affected by the moon.

A new era dawned in Europe at the beginning of the 20th century with the development of complex and effective therapies reflecting Oriental wisdom.

The Mind-Body Relationship

The complex relationship between the mind and body has now been acknowledged, and there is strong evidence that many illnesses are caused and exacerbated by psychological factors. All complementary therapies promote the idea of the body as a whole, and promote the idea of treating it "holistically" as a result. Psychological influences, such as stress, worry, depression, and anxiety have an enormous impact on health and are implicated in a number of conditions, including migraine, eczema, asthma, digestive disorders, headaches, and vision problems. Psychological therapies aim to address the parts of the body that some Western medicine has yet to reach successfully - the mind and the sense of well-being necessary to good health.

Healing The Mind

What can psychotherapy achieve? By working together, the therapist and the client can transform a problem into a turning point: the beginning of something better. It is done by using any of a variety of methods, usually classified as follows:

Behavioral Introduced at the beginning of the 20th century and based on learning theories, behavioral psychology aims to predict and control behavior in a, scientific way. Cognitive therapy, which developedi the 1960s, is concerned with perception and belief systems: changing the way we view things can change their outcome.

Analytical Instituted at the end of the 1911 century and now comprising many variations (including psychodynamic), analytical theory regards person's mindset as the outcome of conflict between internal forces and seeks answers from the unconscious. It aims to uncover and analyze the effects of early experience on present difficulties and to look at ways of working to resolve early blocks.

Humanistic This optimistic view emphasizes the essential goodness of human beings and the belief that we all have choices. To realize our full potential we need to get in touch with our inner selves and true feelings, and to be able to express them freely. The attitude of the therapist in achieving and conveying understanding from a position of equality is critical.

Integrative Most therapists who work in this way have a humanistic orientation but also use elements of other therapeutic disciplines. Its ruling principle is the integration of "mind, body, and soul" to constitute one whole aware person.

Special Note Most of the therapies in this section are subtle and complex, and rely on the competence of a trained therapist to be properb effective. This applies particularly to the various psychotherapies and to hypnotherapy.

Wallace Wattles was an American author who lived between 1860-1911. He wrote the Science of Getting Rich and said that he had personally tested its principles and his life would seem to affirm that as for the first part of his life he lived in poverty, whereas later he became a very prosperous man. In this article I will look more into the life of the man who wrote "The Science of Getting Rich" which is becoming very popular again today.

His Early Life

Wallace Wattles was an American born author, born shortly after the American civil war. The first part of his life was lived in poverty and he experienced many failures.

His Dreams and Goals

He spent much of his time writing and we are told by his daughter Florence that "It was then he formed his mental picture. He saw himself as a successful writer, a personality of power, an advancing man ..." Visualization is a key principle in the Science of Getting Rich and one that Wattles obviously practised himself in achieving greatness.

He was Both a Christian and New Thought Philosopher

A Christian convention made a major impact on the thinking of Wallace Wattles and in particular his belief in the "wonderful social message of Jesus" and he also held a position in the Methodist church for a while. Apart from his religious beliefs, Wattles also held the philosophical beliefs of the New Thought school and was associated with them and he started to implement the principles of this school in his life.

Wallace Wattles and the Science of Getting Rich

In 1910, a year before his death, Wallace Wattles published the Science of Getting Rich. This book is his most remarkable achievement and today many people are using this book to change their lives. It is now in the public domain and many new programs have also stemmed from this work.

Wallace Wattles, the author of the "Science of Getting Rich", lived between 1860-1911 and although he lived much of the first part of his life in poverty and failure, by implementing principles which he teaches in this book he was able to change his life to one of prosperity. These principles and beliefs probably originated from his Christian beliefs as well as his involvement with the New Thought philosophy.

Michael J. Fox once said, "I am careful not to confuse excellence with perfection. Excellence, I can reach for; perfection is God's business." Those words rang true as soon as I read them.

Early in my career I was a graphic designer for a local university. I was responsible for creating text books and classroom materials for the International College of Dentistry - super exciting work by the way :). Like any job I had deadlines to meet with the editors, publishers, printers, etc... One day I caught myself going back to tweak the layout for a certain book. That particular book was printed six months earlier and currently in use in Dental Schools throughout the Middle East. But here I was futzing with margins, font spacing and the like.

Something made me stop and think about what I was doing. Why in the world was I messing with a text book that would never be reprinted? I had other things to work on, but internally I was going nuts because I knew I could do a better job than I had originally. Mind you, there was nothing wrong with the final published book. It was great. Everyone signed off on my designs and loved it. Not to mention that it was a critical component of actually training and producing dentists. It was working.

And in that moment I realized that I was a "tweaker". My edits had nothing to do with my audience. They were strictly for my own benefit and justification. I wanted better margins simply because it was the right thing to do in my mind. Tweaking was a constant thread in my professional life for years. And to this day I still fight the urge to pull up a logo I designed nine months ago, or a strategic plan that I helped write with a client and make a few tweaks. It's just a part of who I am.

But a few years ago I realized that tweaking was just for me - not my clients - most of the time they never saw my tweaks anyway. When I did bring my revised files to a client, they would look at me like I just handed them a moon rock. You could see it in their eyes, "What is this? Why are you bringing this to me now?"

After more than a few of those interactions, I decided that perfectionism doesn't work for me. In fact, it was actually hurting my client relationships. They had moved on. I was obsessing. I was the crazy consultant or designer that couldn't let go. So today, I actively strive for excellence.

Excellence is something completely different than perfection. And it took me a long time to fully understand how powerful and good simply being excellent was. For me, perfection was the top. It was it. Anything else seemed like failure. I look back now and realize how silly I was to think that being excellent meant failure.

And here's the funny thing that all perfectionists know - perfection isn't possible. If it isn't possible, why keep killing ourselves to reach it? If it isn't possible, why even think and act like it is? Why assume that nothing else will suffice? Why do we set ourselves up for a letdown?

Being excellent is attainable. It's not always easy, but it is doable. Excellence doesn't mean that you're sacrificing your soul. It doesn't mean anything other than excellent. And how can that be a bad thing?

When you strive for perfection, you shoot yourself in the foot right from the start. You've given yourself a goal that's unreachable. You will never be satisfied with the end result and that creates a type of myopia. You cannot see past perfection. Perfection holds you back from reaching your true potential. It's a constrictive way of being. Perfection costs you more than you realize.

And here's the kicker - no one expects you to be perfect. People expect you to strive for excellence. Excellence is what people pay for. It's what people really want from you.

Being recognized as excellent in your field is the key to success. So I encourage all of you perfectionist out there to take a few minutes and look at how your never-ending quest for perfection affects your life and relationships. Is it helping or hurting you? Are you getting what you want?

If you're open to looking at it from another angle, ask yourself these two questions:

1. If it were impossible to be perfect who would I prefer to be?
2. If I could be the new way, what would things be like? What would happen?

If you're like me, you'll find that the new way of being is much better than the current constrictive way. Once you come to that realization, life and work take on a whole new meaning.

Like I said, I still fight the urge to tweak, but recognizing how it affects me and actively striving for excellence has allowed me to be more productive, more effective and happier. And that's something that most New Year's resolutions can't beat.

By the way, there are probably spelling and/or grammar mistakes in this blog post. And that's okay. I've spell checked it and I've re-read it and now I'm sending it. I want it to be right, but I also know that I can spend hours obsessing over every detail and it won't go out until tomorrow or the next day. Hopefully a few grammatical errors (if you catch them) won't keep you from thinking about what I've said. So here goes...

The Power of the Voice Within

"A man does not seek his luck, luck seeks its man" - an Irish proverb

Control your thoughts!

Here is another great imperative for anyone who wants to evolve into a happy person.

Before we try a simple focus game to help you enter a state of peace and relaxation, let me explain to you why it is so important to put an end to the self-defeating and harmful "thoughts" that bother you all along. Your thoughts are your constant companions. They envelope you from all sides and shape your sense of reality. Thoughts are what make one person perceive the glass as half-full and the other person perceive it as half-empty.

Our thoughts play a pivotal role in the path we follow. While following destructive patterns in life, we involuntarily and subconsciously take on damaging and eroding thoughts. Ask any successful man and woman and he or she will tell you that they surround themselves with positive, enriching, sustaining thoughts. They take the effort to subdue, train and mould the thoughts that run through their minds.

Finding the solution to whatever is bothering you is very much within reach if you get in control of your inner life. The best decisions for work, family or various other problems are taken when you are at peace and relaxed. The purpose of this exercise is to help you deal with stress and anxiety and better focus on what will make you happy.

Exercise-

Enjoy the silence within you!

The best moment to try this exercise for the first time is at home before going to sleep. Simply lie on your back and feel all the tension of the day leave your body; first you need to relax all the muscles of your body one by one. Once you've done that, contemplate your thoughts and discard them one by one! Guide these thoughts gently out of your mind.

As you let all thoughts - positive and negative - go, you'll be surprised to discover a big "void" inside of you and a silence I'm sure you didn't even suspect ever existed. Try to maintain it for as long as you can. Feel the crystal clear stillness of your subconscious mind. Enjoy this abyss of nothingness. Believe me: this stillness and silence is addictive. It is also very nourishing. Most surely, you will sink into a deep and rejuvenating slumber to get up in the morning with the awesome awareness of the deep stillness within you.

Now here comes the big challenge: try and practice this exercise whenever you feel stressed or anxious. Tap into this vast resource of nothingness, and lull your worries in its lap. A new boost of energy will surely flow into your system and allow you to continue daily tasks with improved vigor and zest.

Practice this exercise as often as you get the chance, since it will increase self-control and help you improve all aspects of your life. A more relaxed person definitely communicates better; instead of being a grumpy life-partner, you'll now have enough energy to surprise your beloved with warm attentions and an open attitude. Once you become the master of your mind, you can take the steering wheel in your hands and zoom your way to happy beginnings.

It's officially the New Year and time to jump -start all those noble resolutions you made to yourself for 2008. I hope among your list of priorities are some fashion /style/image resolutions. If not, let me give you some ideas-you'll thank me at the end of the year if you abide by these 6 rules:

1. Stand out from the pack with your own sense of style

You have to determine and understand your own unique fashion sensibility. What makes you feel great? What looks do you gravitate towards? Who do you admire? Make this the year you develop your own signature style and rock it!

2. Dare to try one different fashion/beauty/style thing each month

Change is the only constant-that is what the sages have said since the beginning of time. And the same applies to updating your look every year. Don't get stuck in a style rut. Mix things up. Change your hairstyle or hair color. Try applying makeup differently. Try wearing fresh, new colors. There are myriad ways to make subtle changes that will keep you looking up-to-date and in style.

3. Make EVERYDAY an occasion to look fantastic

It doesn't matter what you do, where you go or who you may meet. The minute you walk out your door you will interact with others. Don't waste any opportunity to put your best face forward. Dress up just for the heck of it. You will feel fabulous and that's what counts.

4. Add a dash of color to your ensemble

I will always be the 'color Nazi'. Color is a strategic tool to use when getting dressed. If you're not used to wearing non-neutral colors try getting a clutch or purse in a bold hue. Or a scarf in a bright fun shade. Color can be sexy, playful, commanding and unconventional. Use color to pump up your image.

5. Incorporate a few trendy pieces to timeless classics

You don't have to be a fashionista like me to look fashionable. All it takes is adding a few carefully selected new pieces each season to your wardrobe. Have your Essential clothing pieces and then augment with a few trendy items each season and you'll never look out of style.

6. Strive to create a lasting impression

First impressions can be lasting. Make your interactions with others memorable, positive, and stunning. Being pulled together flawlessly goes a long way. Make sure you attend to the detail like hair, shoes, accessories. Be polite and considerate. Be a great listener. Make strong eye contact. These will ensure you are unforgettable!

Ooops, forgot your keys in the car? 41520..41570..what's Betty's phone number? What was Julian's brother's name? Missed your best friend's birthday?? Missed the appointment with your doctorr?

There are countless times when your memory must have let you down.

When you look into the human brain memory, you will discover just how complex it really is. There are two different types of memories and both are important in our everyday lives and both can deteriorate as time goes by. For having a powerful memory you need to make optimum use of your brain both left and right.

Let us know more about the human brain memory and how it works.

There are two different types of human memories. The first is short term memory and the second is long term memory. You do not need to hammer your brain for remembering things but master skills that will help you have a terrific human memory.

Short term memory is the type of memory that deteriorates the quickest. It is used to read and to recall information not long after we have experienced something. So you could have recently watched a television program and you are trying to explain it to friends and family. In order to explain it, you would have to recall the information from your short term memory. Also as you read something, your short term memory will hang onto the first part of the sentence and continue as you carry on reading.

The short term memory does have a limit as to how much information it can store. However, if you clump pieces of information together it can help to increase the capacity of the short term memory. For example, a hyphenated phone number is easier to remember than a single long number is.

The long term memory is designed to store information for years at a time. Your long term memory will have information from your childhood as well as from your years growing up. So if you want to recall information from the past, it will be coming from your long term memory.

Now generally the long term human brain memory is composed of two parts. There is the episodic and the semantic memory. The semantic memory contains facts, skills and concepts that we have learned from our past experiences. Our episodic memory contains what we remember from our experiences in serial form. So you basically put together what happened again and facts can actually get changed.

Another fact about the long term memory is that whatever goes into our short term memory will automatically go into the long term memory too. However, the long term memory chooses to either store the information or delete it. It will determine whether you need the information again and if it is considered that you don't need it, it will be removed. So the human memory is quite clever in that way.

Overall the human memory is a complicated thing. It deteriorates over time and it mainly has two sections to it. However, there are things that you can do to improve your memory power significantly. Various exercises have been developed to help you to train your brain to remember things more clearly and that can really help to keep the brain active and healthy.

To improve your human brain memory drastically and make radical improvements in your day to day life please visit: http://unique-review.com/human-memory/

The process of self-control is referred to as the capability of a person to motivate him in order to do thing he needs to do. It also refers to hamper oneself from indulging in wrong deeds.

Self-control is described rationally as an endeavor on the self of an individual that embalms both the process of consideration and the behavior. The process of self-control can be achieved by having a sharp insight and a strong will to set fixed boundaries. This is a wide term that comprises both resolution and veneration. Self-control is a brilliant tool that plays a crucial role in helping an entity to work out control over their mortification. The ability to control the self varies from one individual to the other. Therefore, some people have more ability to exercise control as compared to others. The capability to exercise control over the self can be hindered due to some unpleasant experiences in the past.

Optimistic affirmations in life aid in enhancing the process of self-control. This is made possible by encoding the sub consciousness of a person with constructive energy that will make imbibe positive thoughts in you. The actions of a person are derived from his thoughts. When a person is very redolent in positive energy then it becomes likely for him to act positively to all the situations he encounters. If a person is keen on doing a particular task then these positive vibrations within oneself play a significant role in overcoming all the impediments.

The positive affirmations aid in achieving exercise control by enabling a person to escape from mental ailments such as pain attacks, anxiety and phobias. It also assists in prevailing over low self-respect. It serves to channelize the energy cells and ability to handle and perk up your performance in various areas such as writing and sports among the several other fields. This will also enable in developing healthy and everlasting relationships, enhancing memory, alter dysfunctional attitudes towards others.

The process of self-development can be explained through an example of Walter Mischel's "The Marshmallow Test" that serves to control the altering responses. In this test, he asked a four-year-old kid to restrain himself from having a marshmallow for 15 minute and in case he accomplishes in the task then he will be rewarded with one more marshmallow as a prize. The outcome of this test also enabled the child to have a fruitful future. Therefore, self-control can also be termed as control of impulses. The aim of the process is to endow a person with such a strong will so that in future he is not at all bothered by the unconstructive and negative thing, which will hinder the process of building of his character. The requirement to implement this process with in an entity arises to make him free from ego related tribulations.

The process of development of the self also begins through the self-control process. This process purges negative thoughts in a person such as sloth, gluttony, envy, hatred and lust. It endows a person with the feeling of goodwill, unity, generosity. This will enable to develop a rigid moral character that will aid in developing an optimistic influence. Therefore, a person should try to minimize his weaknesses and maximize his positive facets in order to develop the self. For this, it is essential to recognize the flaws and strive in converting negative aspects into positive attributes. Motivating yourself by strengthening your will power will be a source of great help to you. Move to choose the right direction by checking your thoughts.

Think Successfully & Take Action!

Women are notorious known for having a difficult time saying "no." This word has just two letters, yet we carry it around like an extremely large dictionary...for some of us, it weights heavily in our hearts when we have to say "no."

We were not born with a built-in gene that must say "yes" to every request that comes our way. So why do we feel compelled to give our time away to others.

Each one of us have a barrage of reasons why we just can't say "no" to our neighbor, friend, co-worker, love one, family member. How many tasks on your "To Do" lists are there because of other people's requests? Are you frustrated with yourself for responding to others in the same old way? Why not try something different.

I think it's just so simple...exercise...build your "no" muscles. I can hear the "moans" right now....exercise!!!!! Here are 4 tips to start exercising now. By the way, this kind of exercise can be fun.

1. Create of list of the times you said "yes" when you wanted to say "no." Have fun, become absurd, and still capture all those times when you just wanted to say "no." You can do this exercise with a friend...she too may be struggling with the "can't say no disease."

2. Next to each time you said "yes," put the name of the person you said "yes" to and why. No judgments allowed here....just become aware of your choices...your decisions.

3. Did you find that one person was taking a lot of your time? Or a certain situation surfaces that you are good at and everyone always asks for your help. Let's try an experiment. For the next 30 days, each day say "no" at least once to that person or to one situation that you would normally say "yes."

Making a change can bring up anxiety in a person, so start slow with your responses of "no". If you do it for 30 days, once a day, you will become more flexible with your "no's."

4. Keep a journal - every day take time to write on what you said "no" to, to whom, and how you felt after having done so. You may have a whole range of reactions....from guilt to ecstatic (what took me so long). The writing doesn't have to take long, just enough time to capture the experience for you. You are exercising your "change" muscles.

Final Thoughts

Ask yourself, "What is the best use of my time right now. If I say "yes" to this request, what will I have to remove from my current "To Do" list to make time for this new request?"

We all have to make choices with our time, so prioritize what is important for you to be confident and contented in your life, and let go of the rest. If you use guilt as the guide for your decisions, each time you say "yes" to something you really don't want to do, you give away a bit of your happiness.

From now on, exercise your "no" muscles.

Copyright (c) 2008 Pat Brill

Ahh, a new year brings in new energy, new goals, and new beginnings! With a new beginning comes aggressive conscious New Year Resolution goals such as stop smoking, a new job, new relationships, losing weight, not being lazy and so on. On a conscious level, the person has made a decision to conquer their issue and has the energy and motivation to fuel this endeavor which is wonderful. The problem is that on an unconscious level there are energetic imprints that must be removed such as blockages and impediments to succeeding. The unconscious mind holds all awareness that is not presently in the conscious mind. All memories, feelings and thoughts are by definition "unconscious." It is the source and storehouse of our emotions; and it is often considered our connection with Spirit and each other which is also known as social or collective unconsciousness. Psychologist Carl Jung has named this area of the mind, the unconscious, where all humanity shares experience, and from where we draw on the archetypal energies and symbols that are common to us all. "Past life" memories are drawn from this level of the unconscious.

Let's take a moment and look at the definition of conscious and unconscious mind. The conscious mind includes everything that we are aware of. This is the aspect of our mental processing that we can think and talk about rationally. A part of this includes our memory, which is not always part of consciousness but can be retrieved easily at any time and brought into our awareness. The conscious mind is what we ordinarily think of when we say "my mind." It is associated with thinking, analyzing and making judgements and decisions. The conscious mind is actively sorting and filtering its perceptions because only so much information can be in the consciousness at one time. The unconscious mind is a reservoir of feelings, thoughts, urges and memories that are outside of our conscious awareness. Most of the contents of the unconscious are unacceptable or unpleasant, such as feelings of pain, anxiety, or conflict. According to Freud, the unconscious mind continues to influence our behavior and experience, even though we are unaware of these underlying influences.

All information in the unconscious mind is made available to the conscious mind through neural pathways. A neural pathway is defined as an interconnected set of neurons that delivers information (in the form of a nerve impulse) related to a body function. A neuron is defined as a specialized cell that delivers information within the body. Neurons have tiny branches that reach out and connect with other neurons to form a neural net network. Each place where they are connected is integrated into a thought or a memory. We know physiologically that nerve cells that fire together wire together. If you practice something over and over again, those nerves have a long term relationship.

This is the main reason why New Year's resolutions do not always come into realization. It is the neural pathways that trigger behavior and thought patterns that are still in place and most times the person is not even consciously aware that they exist. There is a solution, energy techniques that work with the unconscious mind and disconnect old neural net programming is very powerful and increases the success rate of goals!

We all have dreams and desires we would like to manifest - new cars, soul mates, fit and trim bodies, perfect health, rewarding jobs, increased wealth, abundant free time to pursue our interests, but we don't always do what it takes to create these things in our lives. On December 31st or January 1, we may come up with New Year's resolutions and goals, but most of us rarely follow through with them. Indeed, it's not uncommon for our good intentions to fade after only a few weeks or days and for December 31st to roll around without even one resolution carried out or one goal achieved.

In large part, accomplishment of New Year's goals and resolutions depends not only upon our intention but upon how determined we are to manifest what we want in our lives. And our level of determination depends upon how much we really want what we say we want. If we do truly desire what we say we want to create, then our determination level rises.

At this point, all we need is a good process for manifestation that we can use to help us create what we desire. If we couple this process with our determination and intention, we will take action towards our goals and resolutions. We will use the process on a regular basis. This combination cannot help but leads us towards manifestation of our dreams and desires and achievement of our goals and resolutions.

Many manifestation processes exist; all of them work if they are used on a regular basis. Most recently, many people have chosen to use the process called the Law of Attraction described in the bestselling book The Secret by Rhonda Byrne. Interestingly, Kabbalah, the Jewish mystical tradition, offers a process for creating what we want in our lives that that parallels the Law of Attraction. To know how to use this "technology," which comes out of the Jewish mystical story of, we must first understand this creation story.

According to the Kabbalists, or Jewish mystics, in the beginning God was all there was and everywhere. Then God began to feel the desire to create something besides Itself, but, because God was everywhere and without end, there was no space for anything other than God to exist. So, God had to pull back, or contract, to create space for something other than Itself to exist. In other words, God created a void within Itself. Into this void God then sent a beam of Divine energy, or light. This energy then went through four phases of creation, called worlds, that resulted in the physical realm as we know it. By following this process of creation through these same four phases, or worlds, we can consciously create in our own lives in a similar fashion.

Step #1: Clear a space in your mind.

Even practiced meditators know that it is hard to rid our mind of thoughts, but we can visualize creating a space - a void - in our mind.

Step #2: Visualize a beam of energy or light entering the space in your mind and beginning to move through the four worlds.

Our beam of Divine energy takes the form of the desire or inspiration to create something. The beam represents our desire or what we want to manifest.

Step #3: Get clear about what it is you want to create.

Our desire enters the world of Atzilut, or the world of Being, where we are connected to the Divine and begins to stir and to come into focus. This is the place meditators are always trying to reach -a place where they are connected to Source and to their spiritual core. In this world inspiration and desire are born. This is where we feel the desire to have or create something new. This is where we feel the stirring of change. We begin at this stage to know or to feel like we want to create something.

Step #4: Put your desire to create something into words that form clear thoughts upon which you can focus.

Our desire moves into the second world, Briah, which is the world of thought. Here, the desire for something new manifesting as thought. Our desire for change or for something new, turns into a focused thought - words that express what we want. We get very clear about what we want and we express it in words. We focus upon these thoughts, which have a creative energy, to begin the manifestation process.

Step #5: Combine the thought of what you want with the feeling of having it by focusing upon it as if it were already manifest.

Now, our thoughts enter the world of Yetzirah, or the world of feeling. Just as the Divine energy moved into this world and combined the thought of something new with the feeling of something new, here we combine the thought of what we want with the positive feelings of having what we want. We also begin to get a sense of what we need to do to help manifest our desire; we see a vision of the next right step for us or of the inspired action required to bring our desire into physical reality.

Step #6: Take action to help create your desire.

Lastly, our creation enters the physical world of Action, called Assiyah. In this fourth world, God's desire for something other than Itself manifested as the world as we know it - the physical plane in which we exist. In this world, we lend physical energy to the energy of thought and feeling. We take action to aide manifestation. This is where we actually take that inspired action or that next right or best step that we sensed in Yetzirah. Now we see clearly what we must do, and we do it. As we take action, we move towards our goals, we help bring our dreams into physical reality, we start achieving our resolutions.

Step #7: Create what you want with a desire to give to others, to allow yourself to pursue a spiritual path and to draw closer to God.

The Kabbalists caution, however, that Kabbalah in general should not be used for our own practical purposes. The ultimate goal of all Kabbalah revolves around connecting with God. That said, some Jewish mystics taught that we should ask for what we want and need - if it allows us to share what we receive with others and to pursue a path of spiritual development. Amazingly, when we approach what we want from a place of wanting to receive our desires, achieve our goals or follow through on our resolutions so we can give to others, pursue a spiritual path and get closer to God, the things we want seem to manifest more easily and quickly. We remove any blocks we might have to actually receiving what we want and open ourselves to the Divine flow of goodness. We synchronize ourselves with the original energy of creation - and what better time to try and use that energy than at the beginning of a brand new year.

Do you know anyone who does not know the story of Cinderella? or Snow White? or Sleeping Beauty? Yes, they are wonderful, iconic fairy tales that we have all heard since childhood.

When we were children, perhaps, they opened our imaginations to magical possibilities. And they all had a simple theme: If you are beautiful and act nice, you will be saved from all your troubles by a rich and beautiful hero, and you'll live happily ever after.

It was a nice thing to learn. If you happened to be beautiful, you'd get rescued someday. But you should be nice to everyone - even the ugly kids - for they had no chance of ever getting rescued.

In Thailand, the people think and talk about beauty all the time. They have beauty contests all the time. And they include contests for boys and men as well as for the girls and women.

The fairy-tale syndrome is very much alive in the hearts of young adults in Thailand. The importance of physical beauty is hammered into them from childhood. And they talk of magic things happening if they just have the right intentions and feelings in their hearts.

And they have reason to believe this. A couple years ago, the Miss Universe pageant was held in Thailand. The winner was from Canada. The Thais fell in love with Miss Universe, and followed her career as she was bestowed with fame and riches. After her reign, Miss Universe came back to Thailand, where she had an instant career in entertainment. And the Thais treat her like a princess.

Not only is the former Miss Universe the most popular personality in this country - she got married to another Thai treasure; a young man who has done very well in professional tennis.

But there's a problem. The young tennis player is rich and famous, no problem there. But, by Thai standards, he is ugly. Probably by American standards, too.

Can fantasy and reality co-exist?

All the teenage girls in Thailand are against this marriage. It doesn't look right. It's appalling. It ruins their own Cinderella fantasies -- all this work to be beautiful and no handsome prince.

Doesn't this attachment to fantasy impede productivity? Couldn't we achieve and accomplish much more if we did not look for a magic button at every crossroads?

The Real Cinderella

It's time to set the record straight on Cinderella. How long has she been living "happily ever after" by now? A couple hundred years, maybe? After so many years with the same man - doing nothing more than looking good and being rich - are they really happy? For that matter, are they still beautiful? For that matter, are they still rich? Wouldn't we be doing them a favor if we put them out of their misery?

Reality is a lot better than fairy tales!

In reality, there are opportunities for everyone, no matter what you look like. In reality, you may not always get what you think you deserve, but you always get something for making an effort.

All the stories and fantasies that have been implanted in our minds can be harmful. Even when we say we don't believe in Santa Clause, something inside us wants to have someone come and give us things.

When things in life get rough, we optimistically hope that a magic fairy will come and grant us a few wishes. If we knew more about the infinite possibilities that reside within our own beings we wouldn't waste energy hoping for miracles.

If we are ever to progress in real life, we have to put Cinderella in her place. The story is ingrained in our minds, there is no escaping that. But we can change the story.

The prince gives the shoe back to her, and then leaves without her. Why? Because she didn't have the courage or integrity to do something about her life. She never left her awful step-mother to seek a better life for herself. She ends up dying at a young age from inhaling too much dust and soot.

In reality, you don't have to wait for a genie or fairy god mother to do magic. Our minds are capable of far more than we usually give ourselves credit for. And we can do far better for ourselves than any wizard can -- if we put our minds to it. The End

Keep a smile on your face and a dance in your feet.

Sometimes you may feel pensive and find yourself struggling to understand the origins of your strong emotions. If you make an effort to connect with your inner guidance, you will discover greater insights about yourself and your life path. Set aside quiet time and allow yourself to get into a relaxed state of mind. Let go of your travail and fears, and focus on the peaceful silence within. In this harmonious forum, you can ask questions of your higher self and listen for the answers. You may wish to have a notebook to jot down any insights you receive.

Engaging in quiet periods of reflection can help you forge a stronger connection with our inner wisdom, thus, revealing the guidance you seek for your life. These periods of reflection can also be effected through formal or informal meditation.

Although, you may feel confused or overwhelmed by life occasionally, through your inner wisdom you will realize that this state is not permanent. Within each of us resides a wise, benevolent being that holds the answers to every dilemma and aha moment. If you schedule time to quiet your mind and turn within, your higher self will be able to guide you and provide you with the answers you seek. With consistent focus, this activity will lend a greater depth of insight to your life. By taking time to connect with your inner wisdom, you will discover that the answers you seek are readily available within you.

The mere possession of a vision is not the same as living it, nor can we encourage others with it if we do not, ourselves, understand and follow its truths. The pattern of the Great Spirit is over us all, but if we follow our own spirits from within, our pattern becomes clearer. For centuries, others have sought their visions. They prepare themselves, so that if the Creator desires them to know their life's purpose, then a vision would be revealed. To be blessed with visions is not enough...we must live them! J. C. High Eagle, Osage and Cherokee American Indian, Oklahoma, U.S.A. He is a composer, author, musician and speaker.